Social media safety in the spotlight

For the younger folks in the community social media is a portal to their entire social life and beyond. For their parents, it’s a black hole of depravity that could easily ruin their child’s life.

For Katie Greer, however, there is a middle ground for everyone who uses any social media platform. Younger users need to be taught how to use it responsibly and carefully and parents have to learn how to guide their children in the correct and safe way to be online.

Ms. Greer, a former staffer in the Massachusetts State Attorney’s Office and a Massachusetts State Police Intelligence Analyst, today speaks to parents and students to help them navigate the realm of social media so that everyone can enjoy its positive’s and avoid the pitfalls.

Having spent a day in the Blind Brook-Rye Union Free District speaking to students at all three schools, Ms. Greer assured parents that their children are on the right track when it comes to using social media based on the conversations she had throughout her time here. She mentioned this to a group of parents during her evening presentation for parents only.

“This is not anything new for parents,” Ms. Greer said, explaining that generations of parents before them had to navigate issues that were impacting their children, including Elvis and his shaking hips or access to illicit drugs. And like parents before them, with some guidance they can do this too, help their child be safe.

She advised families to develop parameters that will work for them. What works for her family may not be right for someone else’s. Her advice was for parents to consider who their child is, what is their personality like, can they handle what the world will be handing to them online.

For her daughter, who is anxious and very busy, she feels it’s not appropriate for her to be on social media, and for her son, who tends to be a bit careless, he’d lose his phone before he even logged into any platform. So, to keep them both sane and functioning, she has not given them cellphones. They have a Gizmo watch that lets them communicate but has no accounts for social media.

In addition, while her children don’t have access to social media, she does. Now she sits down with her children a couple times a week and scrolls through her own platforms, letting them see what is being posted. Then she talks to them. What did they notice, how did they feel about it, what would they do if they saw something that made them uncomfortable, what do the comments they read say about who is posting and more.

She also discusses with them if what they are looking at is real or fake and how to tell.

“It’s wild and scary,” she admitted. “But we have to help them work through this suff. Our biggest job is teaching our kids to be good consumers of information. We have to show our kids how to ingest this stuff safely.”

She suggested parents ask their children questions about how they are using social media, what they are seeing on it. Also, they should be very clear on what their expectations are about how their child uses it and even what platforms they are on. She also suggested that parents keep their child’s room device free, no TV, tablet or phones.

“Don’t go from zero to 100 when it comes to giving kids devices or their own accounts,” she said, rather ease into it.

Another way to keep things more positive is to scroll through your child’s account and ‘like’ the positive things you see. This will influence the algorithm so similar, positive, content is more readily shown.

“Know who your kids are communicating with,” she said. “Check their friends, followers and subscribers lists. Talk to other parents.”

During her discussion with middle school students earlier in the day, Ms. Greer asked them to consider if someone published a book with all of the comments they had posted on social media, would they be proud of what they wrote?

Ms. Greer approached the topic by encouraging students to think of social media as a tool they have available to them that helps them be productive.

For starters, they are legally only supposed to be on most platforms if they are 13 or older. Should they be younger and the powers that be flag them for misuse of their platform due to the content they are posting, they could get in trouble.

“You are going on there without any protection,” she said.

Regardless of age, when they use social media they are responsible for the content they are creating, the comments they are making the people or groups they are following.

“Any time you use technology, it’s possible someone will screen shot what you post. You have to be careful in how you protect yourself,” she said.

Additionally, it may not even be what they themselves post. She gave the example of a high school student who was recorded as part of a video making a racial slur. The person who recorded it, posted it on social media. The video went viral, and the student lost his football scholarship to college when it was shared with university officials.

There is always the other side, she explained, when social media can be used for good. Vic Blends is one such example. He shares Tik Toks of his work, having taught himself how to cut and style hair, he now does it not only for celebrities, but for folks who may not be able to afford a haircut. His videos are popular and often shared as he offers his wisdom to those he works with.

“Every single day we have the ability to use these tools to affect people’s lives,” she said. “Technology is a double-edged sword, what makes it awesome can also make it problematic.”

She encouraged students to use privacy settings, set up personalized content filter and to block and report any person who they do not want to interact with.

When it comes to cyberbullying, Ms. Greer was adamant that students simple do not engage in it. Ever. As in never. Just don’t do it.

“Why do we have to rip people down,” she asked. “I can think of a million things I can do with my life besides waste time on that.”

She encouraged students to be “thoughtful consumers,” when it comes to using social media. That means not only paying attention to what they are posting or sharing, but to do their own research to see if something is fake.

She also suggested students take a break, turn their phones off, for a day, for a few hours. Just unplug and get away from it.

Seventh grader Amanda M. said she is on several platforms, but said she has the privacy settings on private.

“Only really close friends can see my stories and I don’t share any personal information,” she said. “I think it’s important for us to not get overwhelmed. I know because I use it so much.”

For classmate Lela S., she is not allowed to be on social media, and while she misses not being connected with her friends, she grudgingly admits that’s probably for the best.

“If I did have it, I’d be on it a lot,” she said.

For their friend Anvitha B., she admits she is on social media too much, mainly because, she said, she likes to stay connected with her friends and the things she likes, including fashion and music and she does not want to miss out on anything.

The story about the student who lost his college scholarship resonated with her.

“I had not realized it could be so drastic,” she said of the consequences he suffered.